Underground Read online

  Probably because, even if she was that powerful, she actually wasn’t the evil boogeyman that everyone had come to expect. Instead she just seemed like a slightly hyper teen girl. Maybe one in her early twenties, who looked a bit wrong, being so short and thin.

  After a minute, the girl snorted, then she took the papers, shaking them a bit and handed them over to Brian.

  Her words were chipper, instead of sounding dismal of defeated.

  “I’m not lawyer, but I see a minor problem with these.” She looked over at Gift, then shrugged. “It says that you signed on to the military. Is that right?”

  The man tensed, then shook his head.

  “Yes and no. Renner here wished that the paperwork would be filled out, in my hand, one day, so it was. A real pen was used for it, so, you know, it’s real, even though I didn’t sign it myself. We could make an argument that it was done under duress, but that can run hot and cold and military courts have no precedence for that kind of thing. They don’t deal with Infected people. They have no mechanism for that in their ranks, since it isn’t allowed. That could mean that the paperwork would be considered valid, even if I had no choice in the matter. Which… Well, it shouldn’t. Infected people aren’t allowed in most government positions…”

  Bridget raised her right hand and pretended to be ringing a bell.

  “Ding, ding, ding! You got the problem in one guess, now for your prize!” She turned to the military man and shook her head. “No one that pops infected or who has, can join the military. If you are in, they have to kick you loose. Not even if they want to stay, which is stupid, but the law right now. They can’t work in any official government capacity, except for being with the IPB in several, rather specific, functions. Admin, medical or as operatives. That means you showed up with a wad of really uncomfortable toilet paper here today. Brian, do you have another take on this? Am I getting anything wrong? I don’t want to keep Carl here out of an exciting military career, if that’s what he wants, after all.”

  Proxy laughed, seeming pleasant about it.

  “You aren’t missing a thing, actually. I’m sure you’ll want to check that with your own people, Captain… Renner, was it?”

  The man nodded then, seeming annoyed.

  Not beaten though. Which given who he was facing at the moment, should have been plain to him. After all, even if the paperwork was good, if Impulse said Gift wasn’t leaving, then the man just wasn’t.

  Renner simply looked smug. It was not the expression Pam would have gone for, given the situation. Not even before she was changed.

  “See, I figured you’d say that. Here… let me see those. Carlton, here on page ten?”

  He folded the papers over by their stapled corner, then moved in and passed them to Gift, his hand touching the other man’s. “Right here where it says, I wish both of us were teleported to Greg Renner’s secret base?”

  They vanished in a blue flash.

  Pam nearly panicked, but Impulse laughed, for some reason. Possibly due to her being insane. That or just thinking everything was a joke, since no real problems could affect her.

  “Nice. That really wasn’t bad at all, as far as getting one over on us, was it? His delivery was even smooth. Better than I could have done, I’ll tell you that. I totally didn’t see it coming. We have Cindy on this already?”

  Brian nodded.

  “Yep, we sure do. Plus, I can just follow them. I’ve been working on the idea for a while now. One second.” He stopped then and looked over at Pam-Pam. “You can come with? Maybe in your armored form? Just in case there’s shooting.”

  She nodded, picking up on the general idea. Gift, one of their people had been kidnapped, using his own power and the freaking IPB was instantly planning to go in and rescue him. From military kidnappers. They hadn’t even hesitated for a half minute, either.

  Plus, apparently, Proxy, one of the greatest serial killers of all time, could just follow people who tried to teleport away. If he could do that, it was probably impossible to hide from him at all, if he decided it was your turn to die. Oddly enough that left her feeling better. Especially after she remembered to make herself feel like foam was expanding inside of herself. Five seconds later she was in her new shape. The sexy black one.

  Her armored chest had breasts even and better than average hips, so she still looked like a girl, even.

  Before Brian could take her arm, Tim, the good-looking giant moved in, his hand out.

  “I’ll go with you. There is a duty here… My people owe yours, for previous aid.”

  Interestingly, Impulse shook her head.

  “That’s just being silly. It’s only the Army, after all. These two have it.”

  As it turned out, after Brian placed his soft tan hand on her shiny black arm and the world flared blue for a moment, that part was true. They honestly did have it. Brian started moving instantly, but that meant grabbing Gift and pulling him away from Captain Renner, who was alone with him, in what seemed to be a run-down apartment. Pam had kind of expected the other man to just kill the Captain, so she was taken by surprise, if only a little bit.

  Even if she wasn’t forced to be a bitch any longer, Pam snorted and did it anyway. It was just a personal choice this time. She glanced at the handcuffs that Renner was trying to put Gift into. That had been working pretty well, before they’d gotten there. Reaching out, she tapped the man on the back of the hand, stunning him. She’d done it without thinking.

  Without even wondering if she could do it while in her armored form.

  “As it turns out I can still stun people. Anyway, Captain Renner… If you come for Gift again, or any of our people, you’ll just vanish. I’ll wish you into the center of the Earth and no one will ever find your body, do you get me? If I can’t do it, then Proxy here will. This ends now.” She sounded a lot more menacing with three voices talking at once than she normally did.

  Not that she could tell if the stunned man was listening to her or believed her or not. She was bluffing of course. After all, she was too sweet to do that kind of thing to anyone.

  Brian, looking slightly constipated, which probably meant he was focusing on his own teleportation, from what she’d seen of the man so far, nodded.

  “We’ll do it too. Sure, you can whine about being threatened, while illegally kidnapping a man. I wouldn’t recommend it. Just let this go, or we’ll make you let it go. You don’t want that. I know of at least fifty ways to make you vanish. Heck, three of them involve nothing more than calling in some favors and having you reassigned. You like Greenland, don’t you, Captain?”

  Then, after a bit of shifting around the three of them, Brian, Gift and herself, all moved back to the Underground. More to the point, they were directly outside of it, along with the others.

  C. C. moved in and hugged Gift instantly, then did the same with Pam-Pam.

  “I was scared there for a minute! Well, thirty seconds, really. What happened with that man? The Captain?”

  Brian shrugged, his shoulders moving up lightly, as if he really didn’t care about the idea.

  “Pam mentioned that screwing with us is a bad idea. I’m betting he gets the picture. If not…” The man looked at her, his brown eyes steady on her own blue. “Then we’ll use your idea? I’ll call this in now. It won’t be a problem again.”

  He looked at the others then and smiled.

  “Oh… Just so you know, you’re all in the IPB now. For real. We signed you up half a day ago. That doesn’t really mean anything, before you freak out. If anyone bugs you, the police or military, you get a certain amount of protection. Think of it like being in the Army Reserve? One weekend a month and two weeks a year, working to protect your country. That kind of thing?”

  It sounded like a joke, but Impulse nodded. Far more seriously.

  “We need to chat with your people here about that. This is a pretty good location for a base. I hear the people in Portland are weird? That sounds promising, doesn’t it?”

&nb
sp; Pam, who was the one who went out most often, or had been, nodded. Now it was clear that Ryan could do that as well. Maybe a lot of them could, after Tim and his imaginary people did their thing with them.

  Still, instead of freaking out, she simply agreed.

  “Weird and proud of it. They even put up with Infected people, mainly. Other than some minor trouble with the cops. That was mainly the military, I think. Trying to use them, the local pigs, as cannon fodder.”

  Keith, looking like a regular guy instead of his awesome lavender lobster self, shook his head.

  “Police. Cops, if you have to be a bit rough about it. IPB Operatives have to be polite about things like that. It’s a rule. An actual one. We have an image to rehabilitate and all that. Or is it uphold? I mix those two things up a lot.”

  Pam got the idea, she thought.

  They were really, kind of, after a fashion, in the IPB. It was probably the price of having gotten their aid. That of Tim Baker, as well. She glanced at the tall man and nodded.

  “We can send people back to your world, you said? Not everyone is going to love the idea of being in the IPB. Maybe even not once their first modes are gone.” She was teasing a bit, not really certain he had a world at all. He was different, but a lot of Infected people were, really.

  For his part, he simply nodded at her.

  “You’re all welcome to come stay at my palace, any time you wish. I normally live in Harmony, which is on the moon there, but I have a nice place near the Capital city on Earth. You could visit both? I also have contacts on Mars, if you wish to tour there?” Underneath the bland, heartfelt, words, insanity seemed to shine through.

  Nero nodded then.

  “That sounds lovely. We should do that, soon. For now, if we aren’t being hunted to our deaths, I should see about getting a guard detail out here. Ryan, I… Can you still do that?”

  The tiny, very good-looking man just smiled. His voice was deeper now, without being out of place for his size. It wasn’t a high-pitched squeak though.

  “I think so? I don’t know if my powers work. I can still whistle. I think.” He did it then, to prove his point. It was a little sloppy, but after a few tries he managed it fairly well. His facial shape was a bit different, so it would probably take some work.

  The large man, who was as tall as Clover, minus an inch or two, just nodded.

  “You still have your precognition. It’s a bit more refined but should hit like fear as well. The Infection insisted on that. You won’t have to live in fear, which I hope aids you, day to day. It was the first time that I had to fight with the Infection on such a thing. Which is why I was a bit distracted and made that mistake with your face. That’s… A bit embarrassing.”

  Pam-Pam grinned. She understood what the man meant. Not about the Infection, or not totally, but Ryan was his mini-me now. Still, they were both hot, so she wasn’t going to complain about the idea.

  “Meaning you aren’t getting out of guard duty. Not yet. We should go get some food then find Grasshopper. After that…”

  The truth was, she didn’t know what to do at all.

  The current problem, one of their troubles, was suddenly gone. The rest of them were still there, but they might have a way to deal with things now. As long as Tim could hold things together mentally. Living in his own fantasy realm wasn’t that bad of a first mode, really. Especially given how powerful he was, otherwise.

  Moving in a bit, on a whim, she started to take the man’s hand.

  Only to be totally blocked by a rather stern looking Dan.

  “Back off! Now!”

  She did it, not wanting to see how the man, the slave, would own her and the others if he was ordered to. It was enough that she understood that it would be happening, if she didn’t mind her manners.

  Laughing, Pam took his hand instead. That worked, since he wasn’t under orders to stop her from molesting him, just Timon.

  Then, all of them moved together, back inside the Underground.

  Her people and the IPB. Which, if she had it right, were also her people now. As if that wasn’t frightening enough for a horror movie plot.

  Turning to Impulse, she winked.

  “So, I shouldn’t mention that I’ve been making money by robbing people for the last year or so? I mean, if I’m a government agent now.”

  Nero looked away.

  “You mean how you’ve had to go and prostitute yourself, to keep us fed and clothed? That… We can do better than that now. I shouldn’t have let you before, but I couldn’t find another way.” He seemed upset by the idea.

  She would have too, before. As it was, she honestly didn’t love hearing it now. Everyone else was acting as if that was real or something.

  Pam rolled her eyes at the man, then the rest of them.

  “Um, excuse me? Stunning powers? That’s way easier than turning tricks. I didn’t know you thought… I mean, come on, I told you about how I got the money, Nero.”

  It was interesting, but no one seemed to believe her, except for Bridget. Impulse the tiny killer that everyone feared.

  “I can see that. Still, as IPB Operatives you can’t be arrested for anything except murder. Well, not by outsiders. If you mess up, we will throw you in the brig, so you might want to stop stealing now. Use that trick you mentioned with Gift’s powers here to make money, instead. I know that I’m planning on coming to rub your tummy that way, Carl, if I ever need some extra spending cash.” She grinned and move over to the man. “Not that I can’t do that anyway, without a wish, if you want? If I were you, I’d totally tell everyone that if they wanted a wish they at least had to sleep with you first. We can chat about that? I have a lot of good ideas that way.”

  Clover took up the rear, as they all went inside together.

  After all, Pam was starving again.

  That probably meant she and some of the others would need to arrange for a food run soon. If they were going to eat up everything like it seemed. Later though.

  For the time being, she just felt glad that everything had come together for them. They deserved a break in life, finally.

  They all did. Even the people she didn’t know that well yet.

  Thank you for reading!

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